More noise, less quiet

As I get older I find I am developing symptoms, that are hard to identify with certainty as a specific issue with my Parkinson's, or simply a result of the passing years. The truth is, with the passing years, physically you start to fall apart anyway. The joints ache, your glasses get stronger and, if you're male, your prostate starts playing up

At the annual check-up with the neurologist, when I check them with him, I find that annoyingly (but unsurprisingly), in the main, they tend to be a result of my Parkinson's.

Whooppeee......................

Of course, one symptom of my more general decline definitely not caused by Parkinson's is my hearing. Or perhaps to be more accurate, my wife's perception of my hearing. She is certain I'm going deaf. I'm certain I'm not.

And here's why.

If someone is going to try and communicate with me, through two closed doors, a flight of stairs and with the cake mixer going full blast, I think it is hardly surprising that I have difficulty picking up the detail of what she is saying.

Besides which she's the only one who is complaining. No one else seems to have this problem.

However, it would appear that with another issue, to do with my voice, she is on firmer ground. From about 18 months ago and with increasing frequency I was/am being told to speak up;

"Would you stop whispering and speak up, I can hardly hear what you are saying"

Which, to be honest, was both confusing and annoying me. I was speaking in my normal voice, if she wasn't able to hear me, her hearing must be going. I jumped to the only possible conclusion;

She was going deaf. 

It has to be said, however, that I was aware of issues, with what I will refer to as the throat area. Swallowing dry food, such as biscuits, bread and the like had become impossible without an accompanying glass of water to wash it down with.

Or wine, or beer, actually preferably wine or beer.

And I did notice that if I tried to speak a longish sentence, I was running out of air towards the end, something that had never been a problem before.

Previously I'd always had enough hot air to keep going.......................................

So at my next visit with the neurologist, I asked if these problems could be a Parkinson-related concern? The answer was yes. He advised that I needed to see a Speech Therapist, and he would arrange an appointment, but due to demand, it would likely be several months before I'd get to see one.

Well coming on to about 10 months later, still not a cheep from the Speech clinic. Sick of my procrastinating the wife intervened and phoned the clinic;

"No Mrs Smith we haven't received instructions from the consultant referring your husband"

Within the day she got it sorted, an appointment was arranged and an apology from the clinic after they found that they had received the consultant's letter, they'd just mislaid it and forgotten all about it.

Well on the day of my appointment, I was let out by the wife unaccompanied. She seemed willing to trust me to get to the clinic unaided, a rare event. Anyway, I left my usual 45 minutes earlier than I needed to, just in case. You never know what might happen on the A38 and I am incapable of arriving late in a relaxed manner. If I am so much as a minute late, I become a pressure pot of stress.

On the verge of a stroke.

Happily, I arrived with time to spare, faffed around looking for a suitable parking place and arrived at the Clinic's reception in good time. Indeed I may have overdone the caution, there were some startled checking of watches by the receptionists.

I was told to sit down and advised that the therapist would be along when she was free.

I do love smartphones, especially when you have a lot of time to spare, they keep you entertained. I was, however, beginning to get concerned about the power level on my battery when the Therapist arrived on time to pick me up.

She was extremely friendly and an easy person to talk to. She was wearing a Covid mask, which made her difficult to read at times, but it was a very relaxing 45 minutes;

"So Mr Smith what is the problem?"

I decided to start with a little laugh at my wife's expense and tell how she had mistaken her developing deafness, by believing that I was speaking more softly. I assured the therapist that it wasn't true, my voice was as booming as ever.

She scribbled notes, "anything else?"

So I told her about my problems with swallowing, and how I was no longer able to do so without the help of a glass of water.

She scribbled more notes, and asked more questions; was I choking? Had I had any chest infections in the last year? Did I cough after the first bite?

I answered them all, with a growing realisation that I seemed to be saying yes to a lot of the symptoms she was asking me about.

When all the questioning had finished she stopped, looked at me and said;

"30% of Parkinson's patients develop swallowing and speech issues. You have classic, but mild symptoms of a Parkinson's patient who has developed this problem"

Damn.......

"Let us start with your speech first. One of the tricks Parkinsons plays with your brain is that it convinces you that you are speaking at your usual volume when you aren't. Your wife will be right, you will have been speaking more softly, you just won't have noticed it"

Double damn......., I'm going to have to tell the wife that she was right and I was wrong. I briefly considered leaving the country.

And so we had a chat about eating, swallowing and speaking, What exercises I needed to do, what foods I had to avoid (bizarrely lettuce was on that list, no great loss but why?), what foods they recommended, Happily here there was good news, Crumble was allowed, provided it was accompanied with custard, heaven on a plate. 

Curry also got a pass. I look forward to turning down the wife's offer of a salad and demanding, for the good of my health a tasty, ghee-laden, creamy curry. Frankly, I deserved this break, generally, with PD there is no upside. 

So at the end of all these suggestions and recommendations, she asked, did I have any questions?

"Yes, will this issue get worse and if so how quickly"

And here believe it or not there was some not-bad news. It might not get worse. This is maybe as bad as it gets. If it does get worse there are exercises that can help. They would keep monitoring any progression.

So by the time I left, I felt quite positive, with a follow-up appointment in the new year.

I'm almost looking forward to it.

Now for tea, Chicken Curry Madras, with a pint of chilled Cobra, followed by Cherry Crumble and Custard. Tonight is a good night.